Some children have a big vocabulary and speak in full sentences, yet conversations with them still feel a little off. They might talk at length about one topic, miss a hint, or not notice when a friend has lost interest. Often, this has less to do with words and grammar and more to do with pragmatic language, the social side of communication. Here's what that term means, how these skills usually develop, and when it may help to ask a professional.
What is pragmatic language?
ASHA describes pragmatics as the part of social communication that focuses on "goal-consistent language use in social contexts." Put more simply, it is "the set of rules that individuals follow when using language in conversation and other social settings."[2] Pragmatics includes both what we say and how we say it without words, such as gestures, facial expressions, and eye gaze.[2]
Pragmatics is one piece of a bigger picture that ASHA calls social communication. Social communication also includes social interaction, social cognition (understanding your own and other people's thoughts and feelings), and language processing.[1] Social communication skills include the ability to adjust how you speak based on the situation, understand other people's perspectives, and follow the rules for verbal and nonverbal communication.[1]
What skills are part of pragmatic language?
ASHA's list of pragmatic skills is long. Here are some of the parts parents are most likely to notice day to day:[2]
- Using language for different purposes, such as requesting, responding, commenting, and making promises
- Taking turns and responding when someone starts an interaction
- Introducing, staying on, and shifting topics in a conversation
- Repairing a communication breakdown when a message isn't understood
- Telling stories and explaining, which are different types of discourse
- Nonverbal communication, including body language, gestures, facial expressions, eye contact, and personal space
ASHA also points to a classic set of conversation "maxims" that describe what listeners generally expect. A contribution should be as informative as needed, truthful, relevant to the topic, and clear and orderly.[2]
How do pragmatic skills develop in children?
Social communication starts long before first words. ASHA's benchmarks describe babies following a caregiver's gaze, taking vocal "turns," and using gestures to request and share attention in the first year.[3] A few more examples from ASHA and the CDC:
| Age | Examples of social communication skills |
|---|---|
| 12–18 months | Requests, protests, and comments; brings objects to show caregivers; points and vocalizes to request[3] |
| 24–36 months | Engages in short dialogues, introduces and changes topics, asks for clarification, and uses some politeness words[3] |
| By 3 years | Talks with you in conversation using at least two back-and-forth exchanges[4] |
| 3–4 years | Engages in longer dialogues, uses simpler language with very young children, and repairs conversations when not understood[3] |
| By 4 years | Talks about at least one thing that happened during the day, and changes behavior based on the setting, like a library or playground[5] |
| 6–12 years | Extends topics, repairs breakdowns, uses language to persuade, recognizes and uses sarcasm, and uses double meanings like puns[3] |
ASHA notes that cultural and linguistic factors can influence which benchmarks are appropriate, and that timing can vary for many reasons, including linguistic diversity and neurodiversity.[3]
Is there one "right" way to communicate?
No. ASHA emphasizes that behaviors such as eye contact, facial expressions, and body language are shaped by culture and by the individual, and that there is "a wide range of acceptable norms within and across individuals, families, and cultures."[1] ASHA also states that SLPs recognize neurodiversity and differences in communication as part of a person's identity.[1]
Research also suggests that social communication is a two-way street. In one study, autistic people passed information along to other autistic people about as well as non-autistic people did with each other. Much less information was shared in mixed groups of autistic and non-autistic people, and people in those mixed groups reported lower rapport.[6] ASHA, for its part, recommends looking at the social norms that matter in a person's own communication environment rather than imposing a single set of standard norms, and describes the goal as communication that effectively meets the individual's own goals or developmental needs.[2]
Signs a child may benefit from support
According to ASHA, difficulties with social communication may show up in areas like these:[1]
- Communicating in ways that fit the social situation
- Changing how they communicate to match the listener or setting
- Following the rules of conversation and storytelling
- Understanding nonliteral or ambiguous language, like jokes or idioms
- Understanding what is implied but not directly stated
ASHA notes that these difficulties can affect a child's ability to take part in social settings, build friendships, and succeed at school.[1] Noticing one or two of these signs doesn't mean something is wrong, since these skills keep developing through childhood and adolescence.[3] But if the patterns are persistent or are making daily life harder for your child, they're a reasonable reason to ask a speech-language pathologist for an evaluation.
What is social (pragmatic) communication disorder?
Social (pragmatic) communication disorder, often shortened to SCD, is a diagnosis described in the DSM-5. ASHA describes it as persistent difficulty using verbal and nonverbal language for social purposes.[1] Social communication differences are also a defining feature of autism, so ASHA notes that SCD cannot be diagnosed alongside autism spectrum disorder.[1] SCD may be a distinct diagnosis or may occur together with other conditions.[1] An SLP screens and assesses social communication, and may refer a child to other professionals when a broader evaluation is needed.[1]
Understanding what isn't said out loud is a big part of pragmatics. Our post on inferencing and perspective-taking goes deeper into those skills.
The bottom line
Pragmatic language is the social side of communication: knowing how, when, and why to use language with different people. These skills grow gradually from infancy through the teen years, and they look different across families and cultures.[1, 3] If you have questions about your child's conversations or friendships, a speech-language pathologist can help you sort out what's typical and what might benefit from support. You can learn more about our social communication services and evaluations.
Sources
- American Speech-Language-Hearing Association (n.d.). Social Communication Disorder (Practice Portal). ASHA.
- American Speech-Language-Hearing Association (n.d.). Components of Social Communication. ASHA Practice Portal.
- American Speech-Language-Hearing Association (n.d.). Social Communication Benchmarks. ASHA Practice Portal.
- Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (n.d.). Milestones by 3 Years. CDC, Learn the Signs. Act Early..
- Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (n.d.). Milestones by 4 Years. CDC, Learn the Signs. Act Early..
- Crompton, C. J., Ropar, D., Evans-Williams, C. V., Flynn, E. G., & Fletcher-Watson, S. (2020). Autistic peer-to-peer information transfer is highly effective. Autism.
Articles from Speech Me Therapy, a pediatric speech-language therapy practice in North Phoenix serving Scottsdale, Paradise Valley, and families across Arizona by telehealth. Our posts summarize published guidance from professional and public health organizations; sources are listed at the end of every article.